Wednesday 30 November 2011

in or out?

if you were building a deck to one side of house, and installing fabby vintage french doors to same, would you have doors opening out onto deck, or inwards, as per your traditional exterior door? doors are on parliament hinges, so can be strapped back out of the way when open. I'm all for out opening, as one can utilise inside walls more fullsomely for furnishings et al. have just given the nod to chippies on same, but had a moment of ?

Tuesday 29 November 2011

six packs and puppy dogs

Movie Review - Twilight - Breaking Dawn Part 1

Alright first up let me say how bad I am at reviews.... but here it goes.

On the weekend me and a group of us gals went to the cinemas (only my second time this year) and it was decided that we watch the current Twilight movie. In the past I have always waited for it to come out of DVD just because I don't want to have to listen to teens going "OMG Edward" or "OMG Jacob" throughout the movie. I already know that Team Jacob is the only side that you need to be on. Thankfully the cinema wasn't too full so those kind of comments where kept to a dull roar.

Bella and Edward get hitched and to be honest it lacked chemistry for me, but then I have always thought that those 2 characters were poorly cast as they never did much for me as a couple. I did however like Bella's wedding dress, if only I have the figure to pull off such a dress myself. Jacob looked a lot hotter than in previous movies and even my friends who were misguidedly Team Edward at the start of the movie admitted to being converted by the end.

For anyone who has read the books, the movie wasn't too far different. Well no more so than normal when you are comparing books to movies. The honeymoon island was beautiful and while it has received bad reviews about how they portrayed Bella being pregnant I still didn't consider it to be too bad. I mean let's face it, what part of it at all was normal, so it didn't really matter to me that she looked odd.

The one part that did stand out for me was the birth. I don't mind a little blood, but IMO it was overkill. I actually felt squeamish watching it all. That and then the way that they depicted Bella turning into a vampire just made my skill crawl a little. I think it was more that I was still trying to get over the whole blood thing that made it harder for me to watch.

I found the fight scene between the Wolves and Vampires at the end a little unbelievable, but then I guess working on a green screen can have that effect. Overall I didn't think that it was a bad movie. If you watch it at the cinema, wait a little as there is a preview to the next movie (part 2) that is a little bit of a teaser.

Monday 28 November 2011

Bitchy girly grump. Opinions please...

its moments like this I'm glad this blog is anonymous....
So. here's the story:
I have a gaggle of gal pals. There's 4 of us who haunted the streets of Fitzroy in our late twenties/early thirties, and it was all a bit Sex In the City.
Flash forward to 2011. 3 out of 4 of us are married. I'm the only one with kids. One (lets call her Maddie) is on IVF and has been frantic to have kids for about 10 years. One (Lets call her Josie)is happily married, a busy artist and determined never to let ankle biters blight her path; she doesnt really like 'em. One (how about Sammy)is cheerfully independent, artistic and currently single, but has had a crap year, with tons of health and personal whammies coming her way.
Now, Sammy's birthday falls a cuppla days before Christmas. For about 15 years, this has meant a gathering at Sammy's house, about an hour out of town- sometimes dozens of us, sometimes only a few. Almost always the 4 gals tho.
I get a call from Sammy today. "I'd love you to all come up" she says. But you cant get away to stay overnight without the kids that close to Christmas- can you?"
I'm a little surprised. This has never been requested before."Well", I say, "it would be easier if we all came up together...I wasnt planning on staying with you, Sammy. We were going to drop in tho. Husby and I were going to share the driving home".
"I'm seeing Maddie today" she says. "I'll give you a call after that."
Oooookay.
So I get another call. From Maddie. Maddie's bossy. Maddie has just invited herself and her husband on our family holiday after Christmas, but that's another story...
"I've just been talking with Sammy" she announces, "and she's had a crap year, and she wants a quiet birthday. So I was thinking that my husband and I drive you to her house, then we drop you off at the train station the next day and you can catch a train back to the Dandenongs"
".....did Sammy ask you to call me and tell me this?" I ask.
"...not exactly, I just think she's had a crap year, and she's still not well, and the kids will be too much for her" she says. " And Josie wants it to be just us, but my husband has to be there because we're staying overnight and driving into central Victoria the next day."
.................................................................................
I'm trying to keep my patience.
I get that people who dont have kids dont always like them around. I get that.
If this Maddie chick finally has her much wanted bubby, I can promise you the kid will be going EVERYWHERE with her. And she'll raise hell with anyone trying to dictate otherwise.

I think that there really is one wacking huge line in the sand between people without kids and people with them, sometimes.
Its not that time without kids isnt fun- it is (eg my short trip to Brissy this year...)
I wouldnt dream of asking another Mum to dump her family just before Christmas.
...anyone else with kidlets ever been told to leave them at home?

Latest atrocities from the Innovations catalogue

* This is a group email my dear husby composed and sent out in the spirit of Christmas cheer this week.
He asks, nay, INSISTS that we continue to be sent the Innovations catalogue.
For those not in the know, it's a catalogue of Stuff. Some of it's pretty funny. See below:


Yes, Christmas is nearly upon us again. Thank goodness for the Innovations
catalogue which never fails to provide distinctive gift ideas. As their
masthead
proudly boasts, their products are "Unique, Unusual, Different" - have Cath and
Kim opened an advertising agency??

The latest Christmas catalogue does not disappoint, combining ugliness with
stupidity as only Innovations can. I have selected the top three items for
those
hard-to-buy-for relatives or friends.

1. Pet owners rejoice. Now you can imprison your best friend inside this
tasteful end table every time visitors arrive. Serve tea directly over its
head as it lies sullenly, just waiting for small fingers to poke between the
bars. If the constant whimpering and whining begins to hamper conversation, you
have only to wait for Innovations to bring out the special detachable sound-
proofing baffles (for that total "Papillon" experience). The only problem with
this product is that once your pet has experienced the horror of this canine
Changi, it will never again enter of its own free will. It is then necessary to
purchase the portable fencing to guide it to its doom, and a Rottweiler to chase
it in. Unfortunately, you will then need a second end table for the
Rottweiler, and Innovations have not yet explained how it is to be coaxed in
without significant blood loss on the part of the owner (You). Stay tuned for
developments in the next catalogue.



2. Wow! A faux ivy screen. I have spent the last 11 years trying to keep ivy
from invading and strangling my property, and now I have the solution. If I
mount these screens all along my fenceline, the real ivy will think my block is
already infested and move on next door. Brilliant. It is comforting to know
that they are weather-resistant as well. Isn't it?


3. Finally. A strong, light, pretty floral aluminium collapsible walking stick
in a bag. For those unexpected times when you just feel a bit crippled. The
cheerful pattern takes all the misery out of immobility and as soon as you can
hobble down to your local fundamentalist church for a healing, the stick
conveniently folds back down into its bag for future use. Brilliant.

I sincerely hope this solves all your shopping problems for the year. Merry
Christmas.

Aria Awards 2011

...anyone watch em? I hear they were on Go.
I didnt
Here are my thorts anyways:
- Boy & Bear: i only know who they are because Betty posted one of their vids here. Which means: a)I'm now officially an old fart and i just dont know whats happening in music anymore; b) Betty is this blog's It Girl, reader of the tides, etc etc; or c) both

- Altiyan Childs won highest selling album: the state of album sales in this country must be pucked

- I read somewhere that they've only just inducted Wiggles into the Hall of Fame this year. What were they waiting for. And Wiggles won Kids Album or Dvd or something for Ukelele Baby. Which was well deserved; it's a permanent fave here at home. Played a lot more often than Boy and Bear or Altiyan, I can tell you.

Tuesday 22 November 2011

if you have kids who dream of fame, show them this

now I can't guarantee that this exercise won't backfire, because it might. hell, your little ones might take one look, leap onto the sofa and shout "THAT'S FOR MOI!". if this happens, wait for a day when they're fed up with rehearsals, or their choir teacher, or some other such related irritant, then show it to 'em again :D

reeveyew

hmm, hmmm, well, this isn't for everyone. for starters it's about the world's greatest torero, 'Manolete', so that counts out your animal rights peeps, it's set in 1940's, so lovers of the contemporary need not apply, it's arthouse, so those who like their tucker bland and spoon fed - leave the room. ok, now that there's just us, I can say a thing or three. this is one of those flicks that studio put on a shelf for ... would you believe, 5 years. never released in cinemas, now on new release dvd. shot in espana, spanish cast apart from ade brody, in english ... and there's your first problem. I really, REALLY don't like to see non-english happenings in english. makes it very hard to suspend disbelief. further problems abound, but in amongst the flaws ... and like I said, there are plenty, there is some very fine art. beautiful, even. and of course, who can go past mr brody for performances. the man is probably the best actor on the planet, or one of the best few at any rate. penny cruz is bombshelly but broken and fragile and other angsty stuff. worth a look for, if nothing else, ade's arse in those duds :p

Monday 21 November 2011

torn! we're torn!

ON THE ONE HAND:

Canberra National Folk Festival 2012:

http://www.folkfestival.org.au/

- will have great kids festival
- Shooglenifty are playing, oooh yes they are....
- lots of other fabbo performers, all folky the way we loves it...
- husby wants a week in Canberra to study & I could send him on up then meet him with the kidlets for the fest.
- allure of the Famille Darthsideous to wave at

ON THE OTHER HAND

Byron Bluesfest 2012

http://www.bluesfest.com.au/

- Roger Daltrey
- Crosby Stills & Nash
- Donovan (ok, maybe he's not as much a drawcard. Very funny tho)
- I just adore Byron Bay and as a southerner crave time up there
- they have a creche with qualified carers and my kid WANTED to go last year.

what to do....oh what to do....

Saturday 19 November 2011

She's Done it Again

Sis' has made a cakey for Dad's birthday on Sundee:


Phantom. Ghost Who Walks. Man Who Cannot Die. Which is kind of fitting, if you knew my father's health dramas of the past 12 months. Dont ask. But he's still here. Let us eat cake.

Friday 18 November 2011

your turnses

now that we've opened the gates and turned this previously sensible blog into a chickfest of photo swappery and recipe sharing, I expect to see headless likenesses of all of you in favourite clobber before the month is out. rightyo.

threads

hola ladeeez. wanted to show off my new (old) dress ... just because I love it so much. you might need your sunglasses given there's a bit of twilight white skin showing :D anyway, circa mid 40's, in very dark blue complex and gloriously heavy but not hot crepe. and check out the self-covered buttons! even has shoulder pads and metal side zip, yay. swirly floaty knee length skirt. looks cracking with my red mary janes. sigh ... dress happiness ....
what was that you were saying about viggo's eyes, betts?
speaking of beautiful beardy men. this unit (hank cavill, the Real Edward) gives viggo a run for his child support money. just check out those lips ... viggo can't compete in that area, no sir.

You ask, we deliver...some Viggo for Darthy...

Thursday 17 November 2011

plenty of viggo?

if only

!

attenzioni where the puck is everyone? betty? wilma? jonesy? bikkies? smokey? new person?

Saturday 12 November 2011

...proof: i have an awesome geniarse of a sis

...Here's the cakey she whipped up yesterday for my 2 year old. She sent me thru these photos at midnight. Must have spent all day yesterday getting them happening.

It's Birthday Time....

Wish me luck, folks. Am having the 2 year old & the 5 year olds party at the same time today. Sausage sizzle at the local park/playground. With Kid A's kinder friends and with toddly's playgroup colleagues. It may be crowded, but it wont be at our place :D
in the meantime, my immensely talented sister has handmade cakes for both kidlets. here's her 'Princess Crown Cake' she's made for Kid A:

Thursday 10 November 2011

what hot days can lead to

As a direct result of the hideous weather here yesterday, I snaffled an armful of frosty looking flicks at one buck wednesday. this was first cab off the rank last night. oh.my.god. and I don't say that lightly. a really well crafted low-budget independent scarefest. and not a single bogeyman, spook, serial killer, supernatural event or otherwise. just another day on the piste ... gone horribly wrong.

Wednesday 9 November 2011

Melbourne Weather

Is crazy...... 4 seasons to a day That is all that I have to say :)

Tuesday 8 November 2011

School Holidays....

I be filled with excitement, husby be filled with trepidation...I've booked an unpowered campsite at Tidal River.
Wilsons Prom! Yeah! Cheap holiday in paradise
I love camping. Kids'll go nuts for it. Husby will curl into a foetal ball and endure.
Everyone pray for good weather for us please....we need no rain, around 27 degrees, sunny, post Christmas for a week.

speaking of yulefest ...

the uhmericans are square dancing in the dumbdumb place over the yays and nays of it all, so I thought I'd wax yuley here - by way of a vox pop. I've been party to a few disgruntled mater eruptions by the school gate just lately, and thought I'd share. these cranky outbursts are essentially to the effect that xmas now costs - apparently - your average fam roughly $3000. and they say it goes up every year. que? really truly, what's the matter with these peeps? and how in jeebers name is it possible to spend $3k on one day? I could do a wedding AND xmas for that price, and have enough left over for a honeymoon (a camping trip, granted, but still!). anyway, in my gobsmackedness, I did a bit of a list for this year's lockdown and came up with roughly $400, and that's only if we feed the mob. so the plain old gifting side of things is less than last year, which was less than year before that, which was less than year before that. having said that, doesn't matter far back I go, we never came close to even $1k, let alone 3 times that. as I'm heard to say at this time every year ... god bless vinnies, home-baked treats, and handicrafts :D

anyone for summer?

if so, you can have my helping. we're utterly over it and it's not december yet. abject misery here .... what feels like 100% humidity and above 30 degrees. same yesterday, and day before, and day before that. standing still is an effort. all you can do is mope around in a darkened house and will those newly planted natives at the western boundary to grow rool fast - while perving lasciviously at pictures of snow and browsing real estate in taswegia. harrumph

Ray Martin Q&A

I happened to stumble across the season finale of Q&A last night, literally, I tripped over my television power cord and my 70 inch television screen fell onto my stomach, pinning me down with the screen facing me... I won't bore you with the details of my miraculous escape, using a concoction of a doomsday device, fireworks, and the phenomenon of magnetic polarity... but getting back to the topic at hand Ray Martin was on Q&A last night, and because (IMO) he used to host a show that was catered to DUOF (Dried Up Old Farts) I thought he was a very right wing conservative guy. It turns out he is the only Australian on Australian television who I have ever seen (the parts that I have watched anyway) quote Hunter S Thompson! He seemed like an alright kinda bloke. As a result my respect for Ray Martin went through the roof, just before my television did (On a side note my respect for Ray Martin did not travel back in time and fall before Constantine in 312, yet my television screen did).

Thursday 3 November 2011

the gothic wonderfulness of lexx. happy friday y'all.

UK Squeeze - Black Coffee in Bed (Stereo)

...I have been trying to remember this song for the last 24 hours...all I had was the final line running around in my head over and over. I was wondering- what was it about this song that was so important to me in my youth? When I rediscovered it, would the lyrics be fraught with meaning, showing the depths of my teenagehood? Well. Funky voice singing classic blues progressions. Lyrics about being back on the beat after she's dumped him. Deep. Still a stonking good song and vocal, tho with hindsight Neil Finn did a similar vocal style and haircut much better. Think I was listening for vox, soul and blues sounds as a teen, under all that hair and makeup. Keep an eye out for the Ted Dansen look alike on keyboards, giving the vid a distinct 'Cheers' feel......

Wednesday 2 November 2011

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Flying

Found one! Flying Car for Smokey :D

Prefab Sprout - Cars And Girls

...Looking for 80s songs about flying cars....Prefab Sprout. Now there's a band i havent thought about for a werry werry long time. We just dont gaze compellingly at cameras they way we did in the 80s anymore....

Ghost Stories for Halloween

Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
As Toddly would say....'Carey......'
Been meaning to plop a ghost story entry down all week.
What've we got, folks?
I'll start with:

- 3 years ago, when Kid A was 2, I was working in an aged care facility. I was at home after work, having a cuppa with friends Sarah and Mel, when Kid A walked into the room. 'Mummy', she says, frowning, 'I dont like that grandma'.
Mel, Sarah and I look at each other. 'These arent grandmas, darling', i say.
'Not them! The grandma! Over there!' She points to the doorway. The empty doorway....
'How long's she been there, darling?' I ask
'She came home from work with you' says Kid A.

wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The Race that Stops a Nation

.........so does it/did it?
Easy for us. We get a public holiday for the Melbourne Cup. Held the annual rellie bbq, had a cup sweep and a bbq and toddly let the chooks out.
Any ripples interstate? Was a very nice day...

Tuesday 1 November 2011

Flying Cars

Hi y'all, I am kinda in a Dilbert office environ at the moment, minus the cubicles, I am also at pole position, i.e. everyone is sitting behind me... i.e. everyone is watching my computer screen i.e. watching my computer screen as if it is screening a movie to airline passengers... i.e. why I do not get on here nowadays... So anyway getting back to the topic at hand, we were all promised flying cars some time during the eighties. Then eleven years ago these flying cars did not eventuate, it seems, by my reckoning, that people have taken matters into their own hands and bought four-wheeled drives. Even though they are not cruising at altitudes of 3000 feet they are cruising an extra 90 centimetres above sedan, hatchback, station-wagon etc drivers.